Chapter 1: The Weight of Cold Earth
“And what about the money Everett promised for your sister’s birthday bash?” was the very first thing my mother said to me the moment I stepped away from my husband’s final resting place.
I could still feel the damp, heavy earth clinging to my expensive leather shoes, a grim reminder of the morning’s activities.
Everett’s mahogany coffin had only just vanished beneath that oppressive gray sky, the kind of winter heavens that feel like they are physically crushing the air out of your lungs.
At the windswept cemetery, only the weary priest, two of his dedicated groundskeepers, and I remained standing there in the silence, feeling as though my entire world had been violently ripped away from me.
My own family was nowhere to be seen among the rows of headstones.
Not my mother, Jasmine, nor my father, nor my younger sister Penelope, nor any of those aunts and uncles who always preached that blood was thicker than water.
They had all given me their solemn word that they would be by my side during the darkest hour of my life, yet here I was, entirely alone.
But while I was busy burying the only man who had ever truly loved me without conditions, they were all busy living it up at Penelope’s birthday celebration.
They were gathered in a flashy event hall in the suburbs of Phoenix, complete with blaring country music, oversized gold balloons, and champagne toasts meant for social media perfection.
I knew exactly what they were doing because my phone started vibrating incessantly inside my designer bag, buzzing like a trapped insect.
I didn’t want to look at the screen, but my thumb moved against my better judgment, and there were the Instagram stories for the entire world to see.
There was Penelope in a sequined emerald dress, my mother lifting a crystal glass high in the air, and my father flashing a toothy grin next to a tiered cake that screamed Queen Forever in bold glitter.
A wave of bitter nausea rolled through my stomach, leaving me breathless and shaking in the biting wind.
In one particular photo, my mother had captioned the moment with: Celebrating true life with those who are always there for you.
Those who are always there, I whispered to myself, and I realized with a sudden, icy clarity that I had never truly been one of those people in her eyes.
I shoved the phone back into my bag, my hands trembling violently, and I realized that the tears had stopped, leaving me with a strange, hollow sensation in my chest.
When I finally reached my car, the dashboard screen lit up with twenty-three missed calls from my mother, and for one fleeting, desperate second, I thought she might have had a change of heart.
I truly believed she might have realized her mistake and was calling to say, Honey, please forgive me, I honestly do not know how I could have let you down in such a terrible way today.
I took a deep breath, wiped my face, and called her back while sitting in the driver’s seat.
She answered on the very first ring, her voice sharp and impatient as if she were waiting for a service representative.
“Selena, finally, I have been trying to reach you because I need to talk to you about something urgent,” she blurted out without even asking how I was holding up.
“The party is becoming an absolute disaster, and the venue manager is breathing down our necks about the final payment.”
I didn’t say a single word, just gripped the steering wheel so hard my knuckles turned a ghostly shade of white.
“Your sister is absolutely furious, and honestly, we are all so embarrassed because Everett said he was going to cover the cost of the hall,” she continued, completely ignoring the fact that I was sitting in a cemetery.
“We still have not paid the deposit, and I need you to transfer the funds to my account right this second, Selena.”
I stared blankly at the fogged-up windshield, watching the condensation drip down like slow, agonizing tears.
“Mother, I am sitting in my car after just coming from my husband’s funeral,” I said, my voice barely audible but firm.
“Yes, honey, I know that, and I am so sorry for your loss, but we cannot let these people down when the party is already in full swing,” she snapped back.
